Workshop, it was fabulous. But I'm tired and I just want to go home. And so, apparently, there's some kind of storm activity or some mechanical problems. So that evening, I go to catch my flight, they say it's canceled and that I have to fly the next day. And so, I'm really bummed out because home is where I want to be. And so, I'm a little bit frustrated, but I can handle that. So they give me a voucher to go to a hotel. I go to a hotel just to have a night's sleep and prepare for the next morning. My flight's supposed to leave at 7:10. And so, I get up the next morning about 5:30 because I have to return the rental car. So I didn't get a whole lot of sleep, and sleeping in smoky hotels isn't necessarily the best way to start your day.
But at any rate... So I go to the hotel. I took the rental car back. I'm going back to the airport, and my 7:00 flight is canceled. Now, it was canceled the night before, and now it's canceled again at 7:00 am. And so, the next flight out that I can take to Milwaukee is at ten o'clock. So having no other choice, I go there. Now, I really want to get home, and I'm starting to get a little hot into the collar. But then I remember the thing that I always talk about. Right?
So I'm practicing what I preach at this point, because this is where the rubber meets the road, that people are doing the best they can with what they have to do their job and that there's dignity and honor in being human. I always say that. That's like my mantra. Right? I mean, you've heard me say that here, as well as other places. Right?
So I say that all the time, "There is dignity and honor in being human." But here is an opportunity for me to... I'm being challenged on this. Right? So how do I deal with this craziness of being stuck? So my flight leaves at 10:00. I get on the flight and I'm going to Milwaukee, and I'm saying this whole mantra of, "There is dignity and honor of being human."
So we land in Milwaukee, and the Milwaukee flight to Minneapolis is also canceled. So now, I'm in Milwaukee, I finally made it out of Indianapolis. I'm in Milwaukee, it is currently now 11:00. The next flight doesn't leave until 4:00. Now, I don't know about you, but these long layovers drive me crazy. So now I have to wait until 4:00.
Well, as it gets closer, they actually delayed the flight because there is another flight from California that needs to catch this flight. So now we are not leaving until 6:00 pm. Now, at this point, everything that I have in me is being tested. Right? I'm really frustrated. I don't have any food coupons, all of the stuff. So I just wait around. 6:00 comes, board the plane, get to Minneapolis and they're holding. I mean, they really put you...
You can feel the G forces. Your face is like Botox central or something. So we're blazing on the trail to Minneapolis. We get to Minneapolis and we are ahead of schedule. The only problem is, there is somebody at our gate. We got there too early. So we have to spend about an hour on the tarmac before we could get off the plane to Minneapolis.
Now, by this time, everything... I've been tested and tried and I've really been trying to keep a good attitude. But I get a little bit snippy and I request two bags of pretzels and a full can of soda. I'm getting back at them. Right? So I have that stuff and I finally get off the plane, and my first inclination was to give everybody at AirTran a piece of my mind.
And that would have been my reward. Had I given everybody a piece of my mind, they would have known how dissatisfied I was, how much they inconvenienced me and all that kind of stuff. But then, that still small voice at the back of my head said that they were doing the best they could with what they had to get you to your destination.
And so, I listened to that voice and I didn't say anything. I didn't say anything. I just kind of... I said, "That was a learning experience. Something great may happen out of this, or maybe I was supposed to learn patience." Because that is how you learn it, by practicing. Right? And so, I just kind of left that alone and didn't talk about it to a whole bunch of folks.
And then I got a letter from the mail from AirTran. Now, these were the folks who kept me waiting and all of this kind of stuff. So I got this letter from AirTran and the letter said, "We apologize for the inconvenience that we have caused you." Now, I didn't say anything. Right? So they sent me this letter, "We apologize for the inconvenience. We understand the importance of you getting home, blah, blah, blah..."
These were all things I'm thinking and they are saying them to me. Right? "And because we want to keep you as a valuable customer, we want to send you on a round trip flight with a ticket to any place that AirTran travels, any place. Within the next year, you can go anywhere." Now, my first inclination would have been to tell these people off and give them a piece of my mind. And that, probably, would just get extra peanuts.
And it is really interesting that I would have got the satisfaction of giving them a piece of my mind. That would have been my reward. But I held my peace and I understood that they were doing the best that they could. And I got a totally different and more beautiful and more special reward.
Pause today, pause today. And when you have that first inclination to make that move, pause and just sit back, take a deep breath and think about what lessons could be learned and what's your reward. I'm Andre Koen, until next time.
Justice takes off her blind fold.
Understand the the impact of racial profiling, implicit bias and the real power behind the 1964 Civil rights act.
1. Lawyers will discuss methods for over coming professional, system bias
2. Clarifying the difference between, discrimination, prejudice and bigotry
3. Examine problematic forms bias: " reverse discrimination", selective attention, implicit bias and stereotyping in the justice system
4. Develop a personal action plan for personal and organizational change
It's 7:00. My mother gets us ready for bed, and she does three things before we go to bed. She makes sure that we've brushed our teeth, that we've washed behind our ears, and she makes sure that we get a big spoonful of cod liver oil. Yuck! Seven at 7. So, she'd line us up every night before we went to bed and made sure those three things happened. We brushed our teeth, washed behind our ears and got a big spoon of cod liver oil. Fast forward 30 years. Before I go to bed, what do you think I do? I brush my teeth, I wash behind my ears, and I do not drink cod liver oil. But why do you think I do those things 30 years later? Because those things have become a part of what I do. They've become a habit.
But how do we structure, how do we get habits? We get habits through routines. Because I did those things on a regular basis, I did those things on a regular basis, they became a habit. So we know that a habit is a learned pattern of behavior that's become automatic, but what is a routine? A routine is a cognitive, something that you think about. It is also something that is scheduled, so it is a cognitive scheduled behavior that we do on a regular basis. And we do that so much that it becomes a habit.
So if you have bad habits, what does that mean about your routines? You once had bad routines. Smokers, when they first start out, have to think about buying and getting cigarettes until it becomes a habit, and they don't have to think about it.
It's funny, Kung Fu fighters and Wing Chung masters and boxers and athletes, they practice these moves over and over and over and over again. They go through drills. They exercise their mind, thinking this thing through. They stretch. They prepare. They do all of these things so that when game time comes it has become a habit.
Whatever you do on a regular basis, that you're cognitively thinking about, something that is important to you, those things become your habits. Be careful what routines you set because that's a powerful thing, because those routines will become your habits, and those habits become the sum total of your behavior. And your behavior is what people see about how you act.
We are so nosy! We're so nosy. I mean have you been in a traffic jam only because people were rubber necking and for those of you who don't know rubber necking is when somebody is looking at an accident while trying to drive, and the accident is some place else than where they are.
So they slow down and tie up traffic, yeah were so nosy. The whole soap opera industry, what is that stuff called now where you watch people live their lives, reality shows right. That is all about being nosy. We're such nosy people. I was reading a book, Jack Canfield's, Success Principals. And there was something that stuck, that spoke to me that took my attention and raptured my imagination and it was this one phrase. "That what other people think about you is none of your business." Wow! We're so nosy.
What other people think about you or how they feel about you has nothing to do with you. It's what they think, it's what they feel. The most important thing is what you think about yourself, and what you know about yourself. Because let people talk. The only things that will hurt you are the things you accept as truths about you.
On this day I encourage you to not be so nosy.
Atlanta, we're all hanging out and we're talking and reminiscing and all this kind of stuff. And for some reason ‑‑ well, there's lots of food around, right? And so, we're talking about different foods and meals and what people brought and what they like to create and all sorts of stuff. And my sister, Crystal, chimes in and she says, "Do you guys remember that one time when we had pancakes for breakfast" ‑‑ I mean, for dinner ‑‑ "we had pancakes for dinner?"
And so, yeah, we started chiming in and we're talking about how that was our favorite meal. It was so exciting and different and all sorts of stuff. And there's joy and laughter and we're just laughing about it, and we're having a good time.
And my mom is sitting there. So it's Damion, Crystal, William, and myself, right? We're sitting there and then my mom just smiles with this great grin and she just kind of shakes her head and closes her eyes. And it's just giggling and kind of bubbly with that.
So Damion looks over at Mom and says, "Mom, what's so funny? What's going on?" And she looks at us and she says, "You guys just didn't know." And we're like, "What, Mom? What do we not know? That was our favorite meal."
That stuck out above all else that she's ever cooked for us. That one meal made a lasting impression on us to the point that we talked to our nieces and nephews, our children, about this one experience. And she just looks and she says, "You guys, the reason we had pancakes for dinner is because that's all we had."
Wow. It's really interesting what happens when we give all that we have. When we give something our best, we make that sacrifice and we make things happen for people. They typically remember that kind of stuff.
Now, it speaks to a lot of things about my family, about poverty and not having, and all this absence. And we can look at all of those things as negative things, but one of the things that I'm so happy about is that we may not have had much money but we were never poor in spirit.
We always had something driving us to understand how beautiful the world is. And although we may not have had any money or anything else to eat, that one meal changed that course of our family history.
You don't have to have a lot to be a lot. You don't have to collect the riches and the cars and the houses. All you have to do is give the best you have of yourself and people will remember that.
Respect can never be earned. It has to be given. The odd thing is the respect has to be given in the face of disrespect for it to be earned. It is easy to respect those who are respectful to us. It says more about our character to respect someone then it does about them and other people are watching us. Popular thought say that "Respect must be earned" We disagree and this video explains why...
Andre's purpose is to reconnect people to their Dignity and Honor in Being Human.
We are never far
nurturing the seeds of change
Andre Koen, Facilitator
Conference call 218.852.6114 ext. 823042
Online training www.organizationallift.com
This Drives Our Work:
- Unity of the Individual(s)
- Goal Orientation
- Race as Construct
- Self-Determination and Uniqueness
- Social Context
- The Feeling of Community
- Mental Health/Wealth
- Individual Striving
- Social/Individual Interest